I am sure that I haven't really been myself for 4 years now. Because I went through something that nobody should ever go through. Something that only leaves pieces and no ways of mending it.

Then I found someone who had all the potential to heal me. I found the most amazing person, but I was not ready. I did not feel that I could be put together. And however much we tried, I could not be okay.

He made me so happy. So often. But I had a mixture in me that was bound to boil and burst. I had a chemical in me that wanted to explode and that nobody could really understand.